considerable grace

Well, it’s the end of another year. I’m sure we’ll be asleep by 10PM tonight as usual – we’re not really into late nights unless we’re taking care of a sick child or a sick Golden Retriever.

I’ve been wishing that I could drum up some sort of godly, encouraging, and pithy thing to say to you to send you off into 2009. But I’m in pretty much a bare-minimum-survival mode around here, so coherent thoughts are not coming quickly or readily.

So I guess I’ll leave you with this ...

Believe God. More than your feelings or circumstances.

Remember what He said. Remember all that He has already done.

Turn away from yourself. Run to Him! And you will see that He is hitching up His robes, running to you, and actually? Giving you the grace to run to Him too.

Happy, blessed new year!

From your grateful friend,
Tara B.

This is actually a very common situation–especially for Christian conciliators who regularly work on church intervention teams for conflicted congregations.

How would your church respond?

Church “Tramps”

Pastor JollyBlogger is home!

And his first blog entry post-hospital is worth reading for all of us:

12-30-08 Health Update

He closes it by pointing us to Psalm 46 and Matthew 6:34:

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

A good word for us all, don’t you think?

Please do continue to keep Pastor JollyBlogger in your prayers.

Sending you love–
Tara B.

I’m enjoying Ligon Duncan’s blog and wanted to pass along to you all a great post from last month:

What it Means to Love One Another in the Context of the Local Church

This morning, after a family appointment, Fred indulged my once-yearly-hankering for a Hardees cinnamon and raisin biscuit (yes, yes, I know that are like the WORST thing you can EVER eat) ... so we found ourselves reading the local paper in a booth downtown.

Feeling silly and playful, I said, “So tell me about yourself.” And he jumped right in, “Well, I’m a high school junior. Playing a big of hooky now to have this biscuit with a cute girl,” etc. etc.

I asked him if he’d ever played hooky. Hah. Of course not. Mr. 100% PERFECT ATTENDANCE year after year after year, that’s Fred. (I still find that remarkable. How could someone have PERFECT attendance? I remember him showing me his 50 or so plastic “perfect attendance” cups when we were courting, so I know it must be true.)

Then I told him a funny story from literally, 1987 ...

I was a high school senior and one of my dearest friends was a high school junior. He was super-cute and smart, musical, on the speech team (I was the co-captain) ... just a great guy. And I REALLY wanted him to ask me to the Homecoming dance.

Finally. One day. Sitting in the parking lot of the Morris, Illinois Hardees, he squirreled up the courage to ask me to the dance.

I asked Fred, “Why do you think it was so hard for him? It was SO obvious that I liked him and of course I would say yes. So why is it so hard for a guy to ask a girl out?”

Fred said, “Maybe it wasn’t that obvious to him.”

“Was it obvious to YOU when I liked you six years later when we were in grad school?”

“I THOUGHT you did.”

And of course he was right. I did. A lot.

I fell fast and hard for Fred–the kindest man I’ve ever known. Ever. Well, tied with my “Grandpa” Bernie. (Yup, if Bernie had been 50 years younger, he really MAY have given Fred a run for his money. )

In two days, it will have been fourteen years since Fred asked me to marry him. December 31, 1994. I replied, “Yes, yes, of course, yes!”

No squirreling of courage necessary for that one, I assume. He knew I was his–we were just making it official.

Now here we sit, living in Montana with our native-Montanan daughter and our Golden Retriever. God moves in mysterious (and good!) ways, eh?

Grace abounds. Every morning, mercies are new.
And Hardees continues to be a strangely romantic place for me.

Hope your Monday is going well!

With love,
Tara B.

PS
I’m still friends with my friend from high school and now he and his wife have a lovely daughter named Sophia Marie. Fun stuff, eh?

We are continuing to move through Prince Caspian and we love it.

Fred reads out loud to us as we cuddle under the covers. It’s so relaxing–and interesting.

Last night, Sophie said:

"I can picture it all in my mind, Momma! Do you picture it all in your mind? I can see EVERYTHING!"

I told her that was what makes books so wonderful–rather than seeing a director and producer’s interpretation of a story, WE get to create all of the pictures in our minds ourselves. It’s so cool!

(Not that we won’t, one day, watch and enjoy the Chronicles of Narnia movies–I’m sure we will! But first? I’m just so happy that she gets to have the pictures created in her own little multi-color mind.)

There is much to do around here–but we’re all going to ramp back up into real life a little slowly this year because we have to take Sophie to the Children’s Hospital in Aurora, Colorado next week. So no hitting the ground running for us–we’ll hopefully begin to get into a routine the week of January 12 or so.

Hope you’re doing well!

Yours,
Tara B.

Wow. How many people do you think would do the right thing in THIS situation?

Calif. family finds $10,000 in box of crackers

Good job, Rogoffs!

Just wanted to report in after my (apparently concerning to many of you!) blog from the morning and let you know that I’m doing FINE. Yes, yes, lots of challenges ... but lots of blessings too.

One of my biggest blessings of the day is this ... I ACTUALLY ACCOMPLISHED SOMETHING!

It’s true! It’s true! Idle hands are the devil’s playground; too much introspection usually means I’m not working hard enough; etc. etc. So guess what? I worked hard! All day long! And in between just being with Fred and Sophie, I (finally!) published my 2007 scrapbook. It’s done! Uploaded for printing, en route to our home with Sophie’s free copy so she can play with it, DONE.

I can’t tell you how happy this makes me. It’s been hanging over me for an entire YEAR. But now it’s done.

Now I just need to turn my attention to our 2008 scrapbook so that I can finally be caught up again. I really hate getting behind on our yearly photo albums.

Oh–and just in case you’re curious ... I use Picaboo and I love it. I will NEVER go back to double-stick tape and scissors. I’m just not crafty and I just don’t care enough. I love having a gorgeous, permanent book of our year ... but I’m never going to spend two weeks designing and then implementing one page. One day. One year. DONE. That’s the kind of non-scrapbooker scrapbooker I am.

Hope you all had a blessed day too! Thanks for the personal emails–I appreciate you and I appreciate your prayers. We’re doing OK here.

Sending you lots of love!

Your friend,
Tara B.

I’m in an interesting season of life right now. For various reasons, I can’t talk about all of the details with you right now. (Although, please know that I want to! Processing through writing on this blog has been a true grace to me these many years. Maybe one day soon ...)

As I’ve walked through my current challenges, I’ve been on a bit of a high-wire tightrope teetering over two extremes:

1. Pessimism - I just assume this bad thing is going to happen; and

2. Faith - God is sovereign and God is good. I can trust Him.

I’m embarrassed to even admit this, of course.

But I do think it’s a bit of an interesting question–especially for we who are prone to melancholy.

When does faith ("I trust God no matter what") turn the corner and become pessimism ("I assume something bad is going to happen; and yes, God is still good")?

I am praying for joyful confidence in our Good God. Truly. I really believe He is good and sovereign–really. It’s just the daily, moment-by-moment stressors that remind me of the battle.

Life in a fallen world. Fun stuff, eh?

The topic made me do a little reading in my Hope in Suffering archives and I found a helpful link that I wanted to share with you:

Weep with Those Who Weep

Hope you’re enjoying your post-Christmas days. We have GOT to do some laundry today.

Sending you love!
– Tara B.

Want to read a story about living the gospel? Don’t miss this one:

Every Year a New Baby–and More Joy

In particular, be sure to watch/listen to the audio slideshow. It only takes two minutes, but it’s a sweet, gospel-soaked two minutes.

(HT: TakeYourVitaminZ!)

Just a quick note to let you know that I drew another name for our Radical Womanhood giveaway (because I never received a mailing address from one of the people).

So Jessie V., be on the lookout for your free book!

Our "daily crockpot" chocolate-covered peanuts for our neighbors turned out a little “dark chocolately” for our tastes, but hopefully were a blessing to our neighbors:



Christmas Eve was a relaxing and fun day. Sophie kept thanking Fred for being home with us all day. We played Mousetrap as a family:



(Hey! Do you see the box from Moody in the background? Those are your free copies of Radical Womanhood! I’ll have them in the mail to you tomorrow.)

And then headed to our church service. It was a true blessing and, thankfully, there weren’t too many clunkers from the ol' pianist (me).

Afterward, we all climbed into our matching Christmas PJ’s (courtesy of Grandma Chris) and enjoyed a quiet evening.



It took awhile for Sophie to wake up in the morning, but once she did, we started doing puzzles and playing games and have had a lovely, fun day together.

Lili enjoyed, well, ATE, her toys:



Sophie got a big-girl-violin-music-stand and some super-cute Hello Kitty PJ’s handmade by Grandma Chris:



She’s still loving her baby doll from Grandma Kathy & Grandpa Charlie and their Mosaic Jewelry Box was a big hit:



Today was our first day playing with Puzzibits:



With all of these fun games, I felt a little like PalmTreePundit’s “SCORE!” – except with super cool games rather than deep, meaty, rich theology and Latin books:



(Qwirkle has been a huge hit–it’s totally getting Soph ready for Scrabble. Sophie is phenomenally good at Stare and it’s lots of fun; moves fast. Operation and Mousetrap are just silly fun. And I assume that we’ll be enjoying Mancala, Squzzle, and the Chocolate Fix Logic Puzzle for many years.)

Hope your day was a blessed one!

With love,
Tara B.

So funny!

Christmas Cake Wrecks

Hope you’re enjoying a lovely Christmas. Fred and I are awake–and just waiting for our sound sleeper to wake up.

Pastor Alfred closed our service last night with a reading from Hebrews 2 and I thought it might bless and challenge you all too:

"Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it. For since the message declared by angels proved to be reliable, and every transgression or disobedience received a just retribution, how shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation?"

Oh! That we will never neglect such a great salvation.

Merry, Blessed Christmas to you!

Yours,
Tara B.

Just found out that the audio downloads from the CCEF Conference are now available (and at a very reasonable rate, too!):

2008 CCEF Conference - The Addict in Us All

I hope you’ll check them out–and NOT just to check the accuracy of my “transcriptions” during my CCEF LiveBlogs.

Our Christmas Eve started, well, the best a Christmas Eve has ever started for me.

Sophie climbed into bed with us–in her adorable little polka-dot “Joy” Christmas pajamas sent by my “Christian parents” and their kids–and jumped right into talking about Christmas.

- How even though her “littlest pet shop” book says that Christmas is all about spending time with friends, WE are graced to know that Christmas is actually about when the Second Person of the Trinity was incarnate by the Holy Spirit of the Virgin Mary; was made Man; was born in Bethlehem of Judea to save sinners

- We talked about how EVERYTHING CHANGED in that moment when Jesus was born. The Savior of the World had come! History even marked time differently ... B.C., A.D. Anno Domini. In the year of our Lord.

- Does that mean we can’t enjoy a good laugh and a fun story? Rudolph, Frosty, even ol' historically-real “St. Nick” and his, no-longer-historically accurate chimney hopping tale? Nope! Not around here. We like the silly stuff and the sparkly lights ... but we enjoy them in context. WHY do we laugh and giggle and rejoice? Ultimately, NOT because of cute stories, but because God has saved us–from Satan, Hell, the world, our own sin. Why do we drive around and oooh and ahhh at twinkly lights? Sure, they’re fun. But mostly, we rejoice because Jesus is the Light of the World.

- Yes, some people think Christmas is ONLY about spending time with friends and family; giving gifts; doing nice things. But they are mistaken. Christmas is about when God gave us the ultimate, sacrificial, eternal gift–His Own Son. His Very Self. Our Only Hope.

So that’s how our day started and I just couldn’t be more grateful. What a lovie bug we have! I cherish every moment with her.

Then we were on to getting to open one gift (Mousetrap!) and eating a bite of chocolate and a lick of peppermint (in bed! before breakfast!). Fun fun. We’re a blessed lot.

Hope your Christmas Eve points you to the Savior of the World! C.J. Mahanney has a profound article over on his blog if you’d like a healthy dose of the gospel to start you off:

Disturbing Christmas

Merry, blessed, happy Christmas to you!

Your friend,
Tara B.

With the exception of one family (that really had, I believe, to do with the parents way more than the family size), all of the large families I have ever known have been just like this one ... imperfect, full of love and gratitude to God, fun and funny (I would assume the ol', “you either laugh or you cry, so let’s laugh” comes into play there once you pass eight or nine kids) ... wonderful.

I always thought we’d have a large family. We’ve talked about it a lot recently and neither Fred nor I ever even conceived of only having one child. And who knows? Our situation may still change, but maybe it won’t. And of course, every day we have with Sophia is such a gift.

But I still LOVE large families! I love to be around them. I love the chaos. I love the love. And this video is a hoot. Hope you enjoy!



(HT: Mommylife!)

Please pray for our beloved Pastor JollyBlogger (David Wayne) as he was diagnosed with cancer last week. You can read about the details here:

I Have Cancer

Hey, friends!

I just received another Google hit on my name based on my DVD series, and I was wondering if any of you would be willing to pop over to Faithwebbin Online Magazine and, you know, make some sort of glowing comment about the series.

If so, the link is:

A New Word to Describe Your Life–Peaceful

Only if you honestly liked the series, of course.

( !)

Recommendations really mean a lot, so thanks in advance for even considering helping me out.

Sophie and I are making “A Year of CrockPotting's” Peanut Clusters for our neighbors (and yes, for us of course!) ... but oh no! My crockpot was too small. Might need to invest in a larger size for 2009.

Hope your day is going great!

Much love,
Tara B.

Are any of you thinking about joining the Reformation21 guys and reading Calvin’s Institutes in 2009?

I am SO lazy that I hesitate to set such a difficult goal. But I WAS just saying to myself, “I think I’d really like to read the ENTIRE Institutes in 2009.” And then the Ref21 guys said that they would be “blogging the Institutes” and one of my all-time favorite churchmen, Pastor Anyabwile, just mentioned today that he and his wife are going to read through them together.

So ... maybe 2009 is the year for me. How about you?

We finally got my little $10 disposable water camera photos back from our time with the dolphins in Mexico and I just LOVED reliving the memories.



Dolphins are so beautiful! And fun. I particularly like the one of us all getting splashed.



Hope your Monday is a blessed one!

Yours,
Tara B.

It’s that time of year again and I’m trying hard to activate long-dormant-able-to-play-the-piano-brain-cells in order to accompany our church’s Christmas choir.

I LOVE getting to (try to!) accompany the choir.

The director (Trudy) is great.
The choir is great.
And tonight we were joined by a wonderful bassoonist, one of my all-time favorite people EVER, Karen Jean Vowell.

Karen, you may recall, is Momma extraordinaire to Kerry Lou, Kelly, Karla, Clark, Corey, and Kayla. And I’ve made her a little “famous” for her grace re: a certain cream of tartar biscuit recipe and the fact that, even at age 30, yeast still scared the living life out of me. (It’s ALIVE people! For REAL!)

She is also a wonderful musician and tonight we had the joy of collaborating on a sweet Christmas song entitled, Gloria Hodie. The melody would be familiar to you, I’m sure, as it is taken directly from the gorgeous Second Movement of the Dvorak New World Symphony.

Oh oh oh! Even with my (oft' inaccurate) accompaniment, it was just such an honor and joy to be a part of creating such beautiful music. And to have a double reed present with us? Hooray! My heart simply soared.

If you ever have the opportunity to hear this symphony performed by a major orchestra, I urge you to do so. (I had the joy of hearing Solti conduct the Chicago Symphony Orchestra in its recording from the late 80’s, early 90’s.)

Or even just click through to the YouTube video.

A little slice of Heaven. A faint aroma. A glimpse of that which is lovely and pure and admirable and excellent and praiseworthy.

I thanked God for ears to hear and fingers to play.
For a church in which to worship.
For saving me as a teenager and keeping me in Him all these many years–not even my sin can thwart His purposes.

I thanked God for Who He is and all that He lavishes on His children in Christ.

Merry, Blessed Christmas to you!

With love,
Tara B.

Everyone gets a Trudy CD!

And I’d love to send them, friends, but I need you to email me your mailing addresses:

- Every Amy except for Amy C from Lynchburg VA (lots o' Amys in my online world and I don’t know who you are)
- Shannon
- Lauren
- Christine
- Laura

Oh ... and to the five of you who are still waiting on your “Radical Womanhood” books ... I contacted the author again this week to let her know that the copies never arrived and she’s having them re-sent. Sorry for the delay!

Love to all,
Tara B.

PS
Update ... thanks Claudia, Jenny, Dede, and Marilyn for the addresses. I’m shipping your CDs tomorrow morning.

I didn’t know this about Rich Mullins. Did you?

He was said to be flaky, and maybe that’s because he simply wasn’t tied down. In his entire career he never knew the extent of his earnings. His quarterly checks from record labels were sent to the board of elders at his small home church. He asked them to pay him the median salary of a typical US worker, about $24,600 annually. The rest was given away to missions and charitable organizations or put into his retirement. Rich said, “If I knew how much I made it might make giving the rest away all that much harder.”

If you love his music (like I do!), I encourage you to read the entire article:

The Best Friend I Never Met

And if you’re such a youngin' that you don’t yet know his music–he died very young–I encourage you to get to know him. I love all of his albums, but A Liturgy, A Legacy & A Ragamuffin Band is a favorite.

I assume that most of you have seen the original version of this video, but just in case you haven’t (or if you’d like to see the new version), here is “The Mom Song.” Otherwise known as, “Everything a mother says in 24 hours set to the William Tell Overture.”



Sophie used to LOVE watching this video. Over and over again. She did, however, have one clarification/correction ... she said that to really be what a mom says in a 24-hour period, the mom needs to say, “I love you” more.

We enjoyed a lovely evening at the Peacemaker Ministries Christmas party last night.

I was blessed to share a table with El Presidente, Ken Sande (and his lovely bride, Corlette), and BrittleCrazyGlass too:



Hope your weekend is a restful and fun one!

Yours,
Tara B.

TakeYourVitaminZ has blessed us all again–this time with a lovely interview with Fernando Ortega.

Enjoy!

Don’t forget, you have until midnight today to leave a comment on THIS POST and sign up for a FREE Trudy Poirier CD!

Oh–and if you want your CD faster, please take 30 seconds and email me your mailing address.

(Really. Pretty please send me your address. I have thousands of names and emails that I try very hard to keep straight–even though only a handful of you actually comment on this blog, 1,300+ people visit every single week–so if you want your CD, please don’t say, “Tara’s given me TONS of free stuff over the years, I’m SURE she has my address.” Just drop me a quick note with your mailing address. This will make us BOTH happier. )

Thanks, friends!

Yours,
Tara B.

Loved this (practical, Christ-centered!) article:

Making Corporate Prayer More Attractive

Between Two Worlds posted a link to a theological review of some children’s books and I was wondering if any of you are familiar with them:

Theology for Kids

I completely resonated with the concern that the authors shared re: just how BAD the theology of most kids books is.

I distinctly remember how uncomfortable I felt throwing away little board books and lift the flap books that we had received for Sophia when she was born ... but the theology was simply unbiblical and un-Christian. ("God loves you IF you do what He commands." “God blessed Noah because he was a good man.”)

I would’ve given them away–but I couldn’t have lived with myself if I had led little children away from Christ. So I cringed and pitched 'em.

How grateful I am that now we have been blessed to learn about so many books for children that are so rich with the gospel–that God saves sinners because He is a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness; maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion, and sin.

Ahhhhh! No cringing there. Only hope. Our One True Hope!

Thank You, Father, Son and Holy Spirit that You did not wait for us to get our acts together and “be good.” But instead, You lavish your mercy on us and lead us to repentance and faith–over and over again; new every morning! Great is Your faithfulness.

I’m off to cuddle with a big five-year old girl and a Golden now–

Happy Friday!

Yours,
Tara B.

Alan Jacobs' blog is making me think and making me uncomfortable–both of which are good things in this context.

A recent post linked over to Neal Stephenson’s, “In the Beginning Was the Command Line” and I encourage you to consider reading it. It can be downloaded in its entirety for free–but be warned: it is LONG and it contains a few swear-words. Those things aside, it is definitely worth the uncomfortable read.

3:50AM here. Couldn’t sleep and finally decided to just get up and get some things done.

I’m thanking God for a small, well-built home that is keeping our minus-15 degree temperatures away from our family. (A recent DVD order to Hawaii mentioned how their wind chill is down to 85 degree! Hah!)

Hope you’re all tucked away and sleeping soundly–

Your friend,
Tara B.

Many thanks to Between Two Worlds for pointing us to this article:

Governor Ryan, the Willis Family, and the Pursuit of Biblical Forgiveness

Dubbed “Fred the Valiant” by Andrew from Boston in a Christmas blog post last year, my sweet husband lived up to his title again yesterday ...

He left work early (even though he has huge deadlines this week and will have to work late tonight to get things done) in order to be at Sophie’s party in time for cake and ice cream.

The party was running a little late, so we were just finishing up a craft at the time I had originally told him we’d be doing the cake.

Was he grouchy in response? Did he make me feel bad because he sacrificed to leave work, etc. etc.? No no no. Not our Fred the Valiant. Instead, I heard him quietly unloading the dishwasher (which I hadn’t yet gotten to from the morning), loading the day’s dishes, and getting things ready for cake and ice cream distribution.

What a guy! I do not deserve him–but I thank God for him every day.

(Thanks, Fred! You do make me very, very happy.)

Yours,
Tara B.

So funny!

The Seven People You Meet in a Prayer Circle

(HT: Stuff Christians Like)

Sophia’s fifth birthday started with a very special gift – she jumped two sizes in violins and was surprised by a lovely little instrument:



We have the best violin teacher in the world! We love Miss Laura!



Then we enjoyed a fun birthday party with six of her closest friends. (We sure missed Scout, Emma & Abigail, though!)



The theme was “all things PUPPY” and Sophie even received a sweet little Golden Retriever costume:



The only hard part of the day for me was that I had a migraine all day long. Oh my! It was hard to be chipper and cheerful in the glee of sweet little girls when every sound and light made me wince. But I did my best! And I think everyone had a fun time–I know Sophie did, so that’s great.

(As an aside–having a railroad tie going through my forehead and left eye makes me a) remember how HARD my time teaching in Orlando was this past fall (!!); and b) grateful for every day I don’t wake up with searing pain.)

Hope you had a lovely Wednesday!

Your tired but happy friend,
Tara B.

Would you like a free copy of Trudy Poirier’s audio CD, “Living the Gospel in Relationships”? (This is the CD that accompanied the original version of my DVD series.)

Just leave a comment by midnight on this Friday (December 19, 2008 ) and I’ll have them in the mail to you next week. Trudy is sharing some copies to give away too–so please accept this little gift from the two of us.

Happy Wednesday!

Yours,
Tara B.

We made it back just after midnight and had a wonderful morning at co-op. We were both craving history, phonics, math, science, crafts–and mostly? Time with our dear, dear friends.

We also celebrated Sophia’s 5th birthday (which technically is tomorrow):



AND, our big news of the day is that Sophia “officially” passed her Children’s Catechism exam with Pastor Jason.



All 150 questions! Whew! She’s been working hard and it was quite an accomplishment.

Last thing we did today was take out her braids:



And now I’m going to start unpacking us. Eek! Much to do before I sleep.

Love to all! Hope you had a great Tuesday–

Yours,
Tara B.

I (unintentionally–she was talking very loudly) overheard a conversation on our way home Monday night. The woman’s tone was extremely condescending and biting. Her words were even worse.

It was hard to have to listen to–but I was in a situation where I really couldn’t move. I cringed for her and I cringed for the man to whom she was speaking.

But mostly I cringed for me. I am so ashamed to admit it! But I heard MY tone in her tone. I heard MY words in her words. Especially in certain conversations with Fred. Especially when I am tired and not feeling well

Oh oh oh! All I could do was cry out to God to forgive me and change me (and thank Him that He IS at work sanctifying me). And then I thanked Fred, again, for so faithfully forgiving me over and over again.

How I pray that I will NOT be a condescending, critical, harsh wife (mother, friend, church member, daughter, etc. etc. etc.)

Thank God for forgiveness!

Yours,
Tara B.

I re-read this every year now:

Pain Does Its Work and Grace Takes Over (by Ajith Fernando)

Well ... we’ve had a great trip, but we’re all excited to back in our own home tonight. This is true even though it is currently MINUS 16 DEGREES in Billings. (Yes, temperature–NOT windchill.) EEEEEEEEK!

We’re most looking forward to being with Lilikoi again. (Sophie and I agree that vacations would be perfect if Lili could come with us. Everything is more fun with a Golden.)



But I’m also looking forward to what I consider to be one of the best gifts a husband could ever give a wife (IF she agrees, of course): I get to walk in the door tonight to a perfectly, freshly, wonderfully CLEAN house.

Starting a few years ago, whenever our finances would so allow, Fred started paying a friend to clean our home the last day before we returned home from a trip. That way, I would still have a ton of work to do re: unpacking, laundry, going through mail, etc. etc. BUT, I would have crisp, clean sheets and freshly vacuumed and dusted everything–mmmmmmmmm. What a luxurious gift! I’m so blessed. I can see why people who can afford it have other people clean their homes ALL the time.

So one more day visiting with family here in Chicago and we’ll fly home late tonight. Sophie started our morning by asking for a barf bucket while we were cuddling and talking in bed this morning–so that doesn’t bode well. But we’ve made it six of eight flights without an incident, so who knows? Maybe we’ll get home before she has another episode again. (Her appointment in Chicago with the pediatric gastroenterologist has been moved up to January 6, so I’m very, VERY grateful we’ll be seeing someone soon.)

Hope your Monday gets off to a great start!

Yours,
Tara B.

I have many happy Christmas memories from downtown Chicago–and I love getting to share some of them with Sophia.

First time ice skating ...



State-street Macy’s windows and “the” great tree ...



Doesn’t it make you want to “meet at the fountain”?



Ahhhhh–fun fun fun. I’m a blessed Momma Tara.

Hope you had a lovely day too!

Yours,
Tara B.

Thanks, PalmTreePundit, for directing us to this heart-breaking article about a naturalized American from Korea who recently lost his entire family after a marine jet crashed into his family’s home:

This is What Patriotism Looks Like

He refuses to blame the pilot or the military. In fact, just the opposite. When asked about the pilot (who ejected and survived), Mr. Yoon replied:

"Please pray for him not to suffer from this accident ... He is one of our treasures for the country. I don’t blame him. I don’t have any hard feelings. I know he did everything he could."

Such grace. Such forgiveness. Such love of country.

Please do pray for Mr.Dong Yun Yoon.

Does anyone else read this blog on children’s literature?

The Children’s Hour

I’m looking forward to poking around through the archives and keeping my eye on it for awhile.

Thanks to this blog, I just found out that Susan Hunt has a new children’s book out this year: Sammy and His Shepherd. Hooray! I love everything by Susan Hunt.

One of Sophie’s birthday presents this year was The Little Polar Bear series. Very fun!

And for our “read out loud” chapter books, we’re continuing on through both The Little House on the Prairie series and The Chronicles of Narnia.

Do you have any book recommendations for a “book-a-holic one week away from being five years old” little girl? I’d love to hear your advice.

Today I have to pack us up and prepare to go from sunny and hot Mexico to snowy and FREEZING (well, technically BELOW FREEZING) Chicago and Montana. It’s been a very fun week.

Much love!
– Tara B.

PS
One of the final things I do on trips to Mexico is take out my braids. Fred helped me last night. Not a pretty sight, eh?



PPS
Sorry that the original title had an apostrophe in it–I know that keeps comments from posting and I try to remember to avoid those!

I still have this recording on an old audio cassette (although I did donate all of my old Walkmen and a bunch of old sermon tapes and unused Bibles–what a SHAME to even to say that phrase, eh?!?–to CRI last Christmas).

I remember when Dr. T.R. Harris (an organ professor of mine at Augustana College back when I was still a piano performance major) gave me the recording and said, "You have to listen to this." He was right and I did. Over and over again.

And now you can too!

Dr. E.V. While Preaching at His Wife’s Funeral

(HT: TakeYourVitaminZ for the link!)

Great, great stuff over at Adrian Warnock’s blog today. In particular don’t miss his links to six conversations among Tim Keller, John Piper, and D.A. Carson:

Eight Reasons to Use Facebook

And to file away for future use, he posted a link to Everything Jonathan Edwards Ever Wrote (Available for Free Online).

Enjoy!

Late last night I emailed a friend to ask him a favor on behalf of our family.

It’s always a little hard, isn’t it, to make yourself vulnerable and share of a need you have? I mean, we would have totally understood if this man had said, “Sorry. Can’t help you.” No problem. But it would’ve had a teeny-tiny element of, "Oh WHY did we ask?!?-ness" to it, if you know what I mean.

But by this morning, he had already written back with not only an, “Of course I’d love to help!” but also an insistence on (tremendously!) blessing us even MORE as a “condition” of helping.

Such a friend. I just don’t deserve such a friend.

Totally reminds me of the time as a grad student when I started to get convicted about my (POOR!) financial management – I didn’t live on a budget, I had allowed myself to go into tremendous credit card debt for unnecessary luxuries and pleasures, etc. etc.

I reached out to Crown Financial Ministries for help. (And did, I should admit, hang up in tears the first time I called when they said I had to pay $50 or $100 or whatever it was to get their materials. I thought, “Are you kidding me? I’m going under here! I need help to spend LESS money, not MORE!” But of course now I think, “What else could a ministry do?” And I see the wisdom of how learning to live on a budget and get out of debt REQUIRES you to make decisions about what REALLY matters–and investing a little bit to get good materials to help is SO wise.)

One of the pieces of counsel that I acted on was to ask a friend if he might loan me money at a lower interest rate than I was paying on my credit cards–so that I could pay OFF my credit cards entirely and make payments to him at the lower rate.

Again–how embarrassing to have to confess to a friend my poor stewardship and foolish, foolish mistakes. But I did. And he prayed about it and studied what the Bible said about loaning and giving, etc. and came back to me and said something along the lines of:

"I’ll give you this money, Tara, but only with a few conditions. One, it’s a gift, not a loan. You never have to pay it back. Ever. If you do, that’s fine, but I’m giving it to you with no expectation of repayment and certainly no expectation of you paying any kind of interest.

Secondly, I will only give you this money if it draws our friendship closer – because my friendship with you and Fred is what is important to me."

And that’s exactly what happened. He gave me the money. I paid off my credit cards and then began to live on a (careful) budget. Fred and I got married, finished graduate school, and steadily worked to pay off our $73,000 in student loans. (All but $1,500 being MINE, not Fred’s)

Two years after finishing my J.D. and M.B.A., we paid off all of our interest-bearing loans and called back my friend to let him know that we would really like to pay him back that $5,000 if he would please accept it. He said that he would accept half, but he asked us to give the rest to a Christian ministry. The ministry we chose was Peacemaker Ministries and the very next month we got a call from out of the blue inviting us to move to Billings, Montana and join the staff.

Even living in someone’s basement for a year, we could never have accepted, left our careers in Chicago, and moved to Montana to work for a non-profit organization if we had still been in debt. Our new salary (yes, singular) wouldn’t have even covered our monthly debt payments!

But by God’s grace, and because of the generosity of such a friend, we were out of debt and free to serve.

Grace, grace, grace!

I don’t know what your financial situation is like–but if you are in debt, stressed about finances, a little guilt-ridden over the wills that you know you should have but you don’t yet have–Fred and I just found out yesterday that we’ll be embarking on a little adventure at our church this coming spring. We’ll be teaching a class on "(Actually!) Setting Your House in Order" to help our church members to actually get on a budget, work on paying off debt, live more simply so you can give more generously, evaluate life insurance amounts, actually execute estate planning documents, etc.

I know it will be a blessing to our family to study and work on these topics again! (Sometimes our “budget” is really more like a “really REALLY careful accounting of our overspending.” Blush blush.)

And maybe I can be an encouragement to you all on this blog too? There sure are a lot of marriage and family conflicts related to MONEY – so this is a topic in the “living the gospel” and “peacemaking” areas, right?

We’re off to ride on a submarine and spend the day at Corona Beach now. (BTW–I’m trusting that you all know that we can only do such amazing trips like this because of the astounding generosity of my sister and her Fred, and the fact that they really LIKE to spend time with Sophia, so they take us on these trips and literally pay for EVERYTHING. Yet another thing that can be hard to receive in some ways–but it’s a grace to learn to receive too, right?)

Thank God for generosity! I pray that I will grow in grace and live as a generous and giving person.

Much love,
Tara B.

For whatever reason, this post over at IX Marks really made me laugh this morning:

What I’ve Been Doing During Mark’s Sabbatical

May favorite quote was:

"When people in our congregation move away and ask for advice on finding a church, I always tell them ‘There’s a fine line between Reformed and crazy’".

Sandcastles & fun at “Dolphin Discovery” (dolphin pics to come later):



Beating Kali & Fred at tic-tac-chess:



Writing thank you notes & I love you notes & planning our to-do list for the next day:



("Wake up." “Eat breakfast.” "Play at the beach." “Play Uno.” "Play Charades." “Cuddle” Yeah ... this kid has a rough life, eh?)

Merry Christmas from the sun-soaked Barthels!



Love,
Tara B.

Thanks, Between Two Worlds, for introducing us to Dr. Alan Jacobs' new blog:

Text Patterns

I’m looking forward to reading it.

This excerpt is taken from his inaugural post:

"I’m a fifty-year-old professor of English and therefore, as you might suspect, a lifelong reader. Books and magazines have been near the core of my identity since I learned to read at age three. I love the printed word and think that it embodies a set of technologies whose virtues can’t be replaced by other media. But I also have a deep interest in and attachment to the online world; I tend to get pretty excited about what I can do, what I can learn, what I can read, and in general what I can experience online.

I’m interested in how reading on the page differs from reading on screens; in how different kinds of screens enable different kinds of knowledge; in the strategies and tools we employ for information gathering, for information ordering, and for information evaluating. I think a lot about linear and non-linear forms of organizing mental experience, and the technologies that make such organization easier or harder. I wonder about whether we’re really losing serendipity, as so many people say. I’m fascinated by the various speeds at which technologies move and by our ability (or, sometimes, inability) to match those speeds. I wonder what libraries are for and what they will be for."

After reading from Galatians 4 and 5 last night, I cuddled with Sophie and talked about our day. (Direct quote from our conversation:

"What was your favorite thing from today, love-bug?"

“EVERYTHING!”

...So I guess that means she’s enjoying our vacation.)

Sophie has been struggling with her perfectionistic tendencies lately–overreacting to her tiny (human!) mistakes; not cutting herself any slack; seeing her sins and immaturity and absolutely despairing.

(I have NO idea where she gets THAT from! Really. Must be Fred.)

So after lots of snuggles and giggles, as I prepared to leave (and rejoin Kali and the Freds for our Partini and Wise and Otherwise game fest), I said to her:

"Soph, what do you think it means when the Bible says that it is, “for freedom Christ has set us free” (Galatians 5:1)? What are we set free from?"

And Sophie responded, "Condemnation and sin."

“Yes! That’s exactly right! And that’s what I want you to think about as you go to sleep, Soph. That you are have been SET FREE! Sin is no longer your master AND you just CAN’T BE condemned. Satan? The world? Your Old Man? If they tempt you to despair (and tell you of the guilt within!), you just tell them to SHHHHHH! Because Christ has set you FREE.”

One big smile and a LONG night of sound rest later, I’m believing in faith that that is exactly what she was meditating on as she fell asleep. And it’s what I’m thinking about as I begin my day today and I’m praying that YOU will be encouraged too.

Who can separate you from God’s love? Angel? Demon? The worlds above or below? Your own flesh? NO!

Does the law of the Spirit bring you life in Christ Jesus or condemnation? Life life life!

("But Tara, you don’t know. You don’t know how sinful I am. I’m really really really REALLY bad! And I’m SO cold and lazy in my faith!" Yes, you probably are. But the truth is, as our pastors are always reminding us, you probably also don’t even know the half of it. We don’t even know how bad we are! But God knows. He knows it all. He knows the darkness of our hearts and the selfishness of our lives. He knows that we could never get our acts together and pull ourselves out of the pit. Even as we grow and mature, we never get away from our sin. We don’t ever become “good enough.” But Christ was and is and always will be. Run to HIM. Trust HIM–not yourself. Believe that what He said is true.)

"For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery."

Amen? Amen!

Much love,
Tara B.

Although this IX Marks entry is particularly directed at pastors, I thought it was spot-on for lay people too:

Any Discouraged Pastors Out There?

If you or someone you love is struggling at sad this holiday season, I encourage you to pop on over and read it. It’s very short–but very wise.

My favorite line was:

"Believe it or not, there is more to life than the situation that has you discouraged."

I just don’t think that a person who never struggles with discouragement or depression would’ve written that line. So thanks, Elder Matt Schmucker!

And much love to you, dear blog readers–

Yours,
Tara B.

Thanks, Maretta, for the great advice to check out Tim Hawkins on YouTube! Fred and I are laughing away. I think my favorite so far is this one:



Things You Don’t Say to Your Wife

Jill Carattini’s recent devotional, "Far Away from Home," quoted Dietrich Bonhoeffer at length and it was so rich with the gospel that I wanted to share it with you here:

"In a Christmas sermon given December 2, 1928, Dietrich Bonhoeffer said, “The celebration of Advent is possible only to those who are troubled in soul, who know themselves to be poor and imperfect, who look forward to something greater to come. For these, it is enough to wait in humble fear until the Holy One himself comes down to us, God in the child in the manger. God comes. The Lord Jesus comes. Christmas comes. Christians rejoice!”

“When once again Christmas comes and we hear the familiar carols and sing the Christmas hymns, something happens to us... The hardest heart is softened. We recall our own childhood. We feel again how we then felt, especially if we were separated from a mother. A kind of homesickness comes over us for past times, distant places, and yes, a blessed longing for a world without violence or hardness of heart. But there is something more–a longing for the safe lodging of the everlasting Father. And that leads our thoughts to the curse of homelessness which hangs heavily over the world."

“Lord Jesus, come yourself, and dwell with us, be human as we are, and overcome what overwhelms us. Come into the midst of my evil, come close to my unfaithfulness. Share my sin, which I hate and which I cannot leave. Be my brother, Thou Holy God. Be my brother in the kingdom of evil and suffering and death. Come with me in my death, come with me in my suffering, come with me as I struggle with evil. And make me holy and pure, despite my sin and death.”

Amen and amen.

And happy, blessed Monday to you!

With love,
Tara B.

Hi everyone! And SO SORRY for apparently (based on the concerned emails I’m receiving) not giving you enough notice that we were heading out of town. I didn’t mean to make you worry and I honestly thought I’d be blogging way before today–so sorry for the gap in posts.

We’re doing great! On vacation with Kali & Fred in Cozumel (Mexico)–having first stopped in the Midwest (during a snowstorm!) to see my Fred’s family. So in one 24-hour period, we literally went from snow to snorkeling:



(A bit of a challenge to pack for this trip, eh?)

Time with Fred’s family was such a joy. Cousins & aunties & uncles & grandmothers & great-grandmothers are the best:





And Sophie’s first time on her “snorkel boat” (it has a special plexiglass, magnifying window that lets her see what we see snorkeling) worked great:



Our Sunday evening on the square (dancing with locals, getting our hair braided so swimming/snorkeling all week is easier) was a blast and now we’re heading to bed:



Sending you love from beautiful Mexico–

Yours,
Tara B.

I’m trusting that all of my homeschooling friends like to laugh at themselves too. I loved this.



(HT: TakeYourVitaminZ)

Thanks, everyone, for praying for Sophia and her hospital test yesterday! God gave us great grace and she was able to persevere and get through it all. (The doctors and nurses said that adults have a hard time drinking that nasty barium, so she really did a great job.)

Plus, we made it to the Nativity Play (barely) and she was able to do her little “angel” lines and everything. What a trooper! I was so happy that we didn’t miss it. The kids did such a great job and it was a hoot seeing them as shepherds & wise men & sheep, et al.





The great news re: Sophie’s test is that her upper g.i. is “perfect.” Healthy. Normal. Wonderful. (But of course that’s also “difficult” news since we still have no idea why she is getting so sick. Hopefully the specialist in Denver will have some ideas to help her come January.)

So thanks again for praying and for asking how things went!

We’re in snow snow snow around here–hope you are all tucked somewhere safe and warm.

Blessings!

Yours,
Tara B.

PS
If you’d like to see Soph’s “performance,” I made a little YouTube video for my family. (Fred is the narrator.)

One of my happiest memories in life is from 1992.

I was a senior at Augustana College (Illinois) and I had the privilege of accompanying a remarkable young woman (Libby Awe) as she sang, “Ride on King Jesus!” for a project for Dr. Paul Olsen’s Black Literature course.

Libby is tremendously gifted and we worked very hard to prepare for this project. And we absolutely nailed it.

It was such a moment–so much fun and so worshipful and so fantastically musical. Real art. I will never forget it. What an honor! What a joy. A true pleasure because it was a faint reflection of–the whiff of the aroma of–Heaven.

If you haven’t yet been introduced to the richness of Black Music (African, Negro Spiritual, Ragtime, Big Band, Gospel, Blues), a wonderful way to learn about this great music is via the audio CD: Handel’s Messiah–A Soulful Celebration. It is one of our favorites!

We’re off to the hospital soon for Sophie’s barium test. Last night was the worst night yet–I just can’t describe how much pain she is in. I am praying that King Jesus will give her doctors wisdom and the ability to help her.

Hope your Tuesday is a blessed one!

Yours,
Tara B.

PS
If you want to have your socks knocked off and hear a taste of what Libby and I did twenty-some years ago, enjoy this video of Jessye Norman singing, “Ride on King Jesus!”

Hey!

Did you guys know that Tim Challies reviewed Judy’s and my book, “Peacemaking Women”?

I didn’t!

But I just got a Google Hit alert for his review today and it’s actually dated July 25, 2006! So I don’t know what’s up with that.

What I do know, however, is that I am honored that he listed our book as “recommended.” Of all of the blogs I read daily, his is definitely in the top five for being Christ-exalting, gospel-centered, biblically-faithful, winsome and WISE.

So if you’re interested, I hope you’ll check it out:

Tim Challies' Review of “Peacemaking Women”

Oh, and THANKS for the encouraging emails and calls today!

I’m currently surrounded by a motley collection of clothes as I have to pack our family for a blizzard in Chicago en route to beaches in Mexico. Soph had her worst day ever re: her current medical crises ... BUT, we are going to the hospital in the morning for a test AND I was able to schedule her to see the specialist in Denver in January, so I am hopeful that we’ll be able to relieve her of this pain before too long, Lord willing.

Mostly? I do think that by God’s grace, it may have actually been a day of entrusting things to the Lord (rather than that other thing I mentioned earlier).

Pastor Jason prayed this morning that I would be surprised by God’s grace today and yes, with tears in my eyes, I must admit that I was and I am.

Hope you are too!

Thanks again and much love,
Tara B.

I had a horrible morning. It was absolutely heart breaking. I broke down on the phone with my friend and wept; and then I broke down on the phone with Pastor Jason and wept some more.

I won’t go into all of the details of either call–but Pastor Jason ended the call by praying for me and exhorting me to NOT “suck it up” but instead, cast all of my cares on the Lord.

But don’t you sometimes find that it’s a pretty fine line between “sucking it up” and “casting your cares on the Lord”? I mean–REALLY. Am I trusting in God? Or am I just steeling myself to SURVIVE another onslaught?

(Oh–and please bear with me as I continue to use the indelicate phrase of “sucking it up”–but it surely sums up my day and I think it’s not profane, just offcolor/crude, so I’m staying with it until someone tells me otherwise.)

ANYWAY ... there were also great moments of grace amidst a horrible morning. One of them was when I asked Sophie to please tell me three things about God that are TRUE and she replied:

"God is good.
God is powerful.
And God is mercy."

Honestly? None of the facts of my situation changed one whit–but as you might imagine, my day has been a bit more bearable. And I’m truly praying that I am actually running to God and trusting that He covers me and hides me in the cleft of His “good, powerful mercy.”

Hope your Monday is going well—

Yours,
Tara B.

Pastor Jason ZINGED me yesterday morning at church when he welcomed us to the service by asking us to, “Please turn off your cell phones–and your AUTOPILOT.”

He stopped me short and I did turn off–well, not so much my autopilot as my ZOOMING ZOOMING SINCE 4AM super-fast-airplane-pilot. (I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep lately. Including last night–Soph was whimpering in pain for hours and calling out for me. There was slight relief after prayer, momma cuddles, and medicine (thank GOD!), but I did not get much sleep at all.)

Anyway ... by the time church started at 10AM, I had already been up and going for six hours. Much of the time was spent on heart issues that actually helped me to prepare for worship. But I was also zooming around getting a zillion details taken care of because our day was quite full after church (not a typical Sunday for us) and I had a lot of things that I HAD TO remember.

So I was grateful for Jason’s call to settle down and listen up because God had brought us together to hear from HIM through the public reading and preaching of His Word. And boy! Did I need to hear from God. (And I did.)

Pastor Alfred was vintage Pastor Alfred and I encourage you to check back with our church’s (soon to be redesigned–HOORAY AMY L!) website and listen to his sermon from yesterday yourself. He preached from Galatians 5:16-25 and, well, it was a sermon that was exactly and directly for ME. ('Course, five people said the exact same thing to me after the service–that it was for THEM–so you know that really, it was just the gospel which is for ALL OF US.)

The two main points of his sermon were “The War Within” and “Living by the Spirit Within.”

It was a long sermon (that’s vintage Alfred and I LOVE it!), so I won’t try to restate all of his points. But consider just a few:

- The most frequent question that Pastor Alfred hears is, “If I am saved, then why do I continue to sin?! Am I even a Christian?” To which he always replies, “The fact that you are even asking the question is very strong evidence that, yes, you are a Believer because spiritually dead people don’t struggle.” Unbelievers don’t care if they’ve grieved God. They don’t even recognize the battle. A greater concern, a true sign of spiritual sickness, is a false peace while indulging in sin (i.e., the absence of a battle).

- The war is WITHIN. Yes, the devil tempts us and the world would conform us to its ways. But the true war is within–at the level of our desires. We carry our sinful nature with us wherever we go.

- Christ makes no truce with sin. He came into the world to DESTROY sin and He IS putting to death the sin that remains in you. So where is God saying, “I need to work with you on this?” What keeps you from trusting, obeying, and serving Christ with a whole heart? In our arrogance, we fail to reckon with our flesh. We feel no need of Christ. Danger! Danger! We are all prone to wander.

- Living by the Spirit? Yes! We are a cross-bearing, self-denying people. We keep on crucifying that sinful nature. Listen! We are not crucifying our outward behaviors. We are crucifying our heart desires.

- (Quoting John Brown) “Crucifixion produces death not suddenly, but gradually ...” Fix your sin on the cross and determine to keep it there until it expires! Have you struggled with the same sin for 30 years? 40 years? Keep it on the cross. Sin beckons us to take it off the cross because discipline is painful. But the Lord calls you to address and kill your sin. “Lord, search my heart!”

- Most importantly? Remember that if you are led by the Spirit, you are NOT under law. (One of the main characteristics of not living by the Spirit isn’t so much the prodigal SON as the OLDER BROTHER–the performance-based legalist.)

- Does that mean you don’t have to obey God? Of course not! Jesus says, “If you love me, you will obey what I command.” BUT your relationship with God is NOT based on your works. God COVERS US with his love and mercy and grace. Your imperfections are covered by God. For example: “You witnessed to your neighbor? Great! You hit him over the head with the Bible? Well ... we’re going to work on that. Come to me. You can come to me freely because you’re not under law!” (i.e., God doesn’t KICK US, he LOVES US.)

- Keeping in step with the Spirit is not some sort of emotional mysticism wherein we listen to hunches and promptings. Quoting JI Packer: “The Spirit works through ordinary means–the preaching of the Word, the sacraments ...” So consider how faithful you are to prepare for the Lord’s Day, participate in corporate worship, fervently pray?

- Granted, we can all come up with examples of people who know God’s Word and live ruinous lives. But don’t ever think that you can live a godly life if you don’t know God’s Word. God pierces our hearts with His Word by His Spirit.

Please, God, open my heart! Please pierce my heart and convict me of my sin.

Thank You, Jesus, that you never leave me caught in my sin, helpless, orphaned, or alone. You have given my Your Spirit! I am so grateful.

Amen & Amen?!
Amen!

And blessings on you as you head into your Monday–

Yours in the battle,
Tara B.