An Abuse Survivor Learns to Show Mercy to Her Abuser

A friend emailed me today asking for trustworthy resources on how an abuse survivor can persevere in wise, godly, appropriate responses to her abuser. This friend was particularly interested in persevering in love and mercy toward her abuser because he is repentant and also because all of the other civic authority and ecclesiastical authority issues associated with his abuse are also being wisely and appropriately addressed.

So I did what I always do when someone asks me for biblical, trustworthy counsel on complicated issues. I first looked at The Journal of Biblical Counseling and all of the CCEF resources available online. I was not disappointed with the results:

Oh, how I thank God for the ministry of the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation (CCEF). And oh, how I pray that God will strengthen them and help them to stay the course in continuing to minister biblical truth with humility, compassion, and practical helps.

(And isn’t my friend just amazing for even being willing to be IN THE BATTLE to fight for mercy and grace and love in a situation that I think most people wouldn’t even TRY to persevere in? I am so proud of her and so grateful too.)

(And yes, yes, before you jump all over me for this post because abusers should be criminally prosecuted and formally disciplined by the church—seriously. I know! I do. And I’m not putting this post up lightly. Please, if you know me, trust that I am confident that all of the overlapping spheres of authority are involved in this situation and acting appropriately. The truth is … I know more information than you do about this situation and I believe that my friend is making an appropriate and wise decision to fight for forgiveness in this situation. Not every situation. Just this one.)

Hope these resources are helpful to you!

Warmly,
Tara B.