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At the root of my fear …
It unmasks me to admit it and I am rightfully mortified by the sin that remains within me … but, yet again, it is true: I have lived a testimony of utter failure before my (best friend and) non-Christian sister, Kali. It happened at one of my fall events … IMPORTANT NOTE: I can only tell you this story now because, for the first time since 1997, I am not flying 75,000+ miles this year. And I didn’t fly even for this event last fall. Instead, I am practicing law again and happily declining almost all speaking, writing, and conciliation invitations. So please don’t try to figure out where this…
- Eulogy for a Bad Mother, Hope in Suffering, How to Love a Mentally Ill Addict, Surviving a Childhood of Neglect and Abuse
Our reactions to grievous wrongs are muddy, not tidy.
Hot tears streamed down my face for three connecting flights as I traveled from Montana to Florida last week to serve at a women’s retreat. I didn’t make any sounds. No sobs. No words. But I must admit, I did feel badly for the elite flyers / business travelers seated around me. They were polite and didn’t acknowledge my soaking neck or my occasional brushes to my cheek with a tissue. But I knew full well that my actions and my emotional state were far beyond the bell curve of the normal million-miler frequent flyer pattern of Bose earphones, laptops, no eye contact, no chatting, and seriously! No crying! Oh well. There was…
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Forgiving is the Hardest Thing You Will Ever Do
As a professional Christian mediator for over 20 years, I have walked with many people through dark seasons of life. You can call it depression. Despair. The Black Dog. A valley. A dark night of the soul. Choose your term. It doesn’t really matter. What matters is that it hurts to live. People can’t breathe. There is daily weeping, wailing. Sometimes people freeze. Just lie there day after day. Not moving. Incapable of distraction. Exhausted but unable to sleep. Thoughts spiraling down and down. Do you know people who are suffering like this? Maybe it is your pastor in a huge church conflict. A friend. Relative. You. Over time, if…
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A subdued Christmas? Sometimes. A happy Christmas? Always! And that is what I wish for you this Christmas. (by Ajith Fernando)
As I pray for the 2018 Urbana Missions Conference, of course I pray specifically for our dear friend, Ajith Fernando. Please do pray for this dear pastor and brother in Christ (and his family–who sacrifices each day to support and enable his ministry). And please be blessed by his reflections on Christmas! (I’ve highlighted a few passages in it–so please note that the emphases are mine.) Happy, Blessed Christmas to you, my friends– Yours in Christ, Tara B. A SUBDUED CHRISTMAS by Ajith Fernando “Some of you were a little concerned that in my last letter I seemed to be open to the possibility of not going to Urbana because…
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Dreading the Holidays? Dreading the PEOPLE at the Holidays? Here are five things to remember that might encourage and protect you from further harm …
In 2018, at age 48, I can honestly say that I truly enjoy the holidays. I love celebrating Advent; I think icing sugar cookies is fun. I even like the chaos and clutter of the tree and decorations, etc. etc. But it is the quiet of the holidays that I love the most. I know that may sound strange to many of you because your calendar’s cup overfloweth in a whirling dervish of concerts, parties, crafting, shopping, hosting, etc. But for our little family of three introverts + Ella, we gear down over the holidays because we are so happy to have me not traveling for speaking events and so grateful for any and all vacation time that…
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Megan Hill’s New Book: “Contentment–Seeing God’s Goodness”
Oh, how I love to read books written by friends! It is even more fun when I am invited to review a pre-release manuscript. Such was the case with Megan Hill’s latest book: Contentment–Seeing God’s Goodness. Like so many of the P&R titles, this is a profound and beautiful book. As I prayerfully read Contentment, I was reminded of biblical truth and encouraged/equipped to act in accordance with sound theology. I was drawn to worship Christ and thus, to turn away from my fear-soaked, other-and-self-centered, “constant state of distress, anxiety, and regret” (pre-release .pdf page 19). Through sound biblical teaching applied to the challenges of real life, Megan Hill helped me…
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A Four Year-Old Explains Reformation Day
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I couldn’t sort out my feelings, but now that I have, it’s too late …
“I couldn’t sort out my feelings, But now that I have, it’s too late. Right now, more than anything else, I wish that time could wait.” Earlier this weekend, I found this (poem? prose? sliver of a journal entry?) on a crumpled piece of notebook paper in my “I’ll get to it One Day or my kids will throw it all out for me one day when I am gone” area of my work space. Do you have an area like that? I used to PRIDE myself on NOT having an area “like that.” But then I woke up one morning and realized that all of the people I trusted…
- Hope in Suffering, Redeeming Church Conflicts, Redemptive Relationships, Relationships & Peacemaking
A FREE Women’s Retreat — from our family to you! No travel required. Just grab your Bible, a cup of tea, and if you can–a beautiful view and a REAL (i.e., grace-filled, wise, compassionate, FAITHFUL–friend). And enjoy!
Earlier today, I was poking around some old files and I found all of the audio recordings that I did for the beautiful women of the beautiful Camp Barakel just a few years ago. Since I assume that a few of you, like me, might be struggling a bit with lingering sorrow, heartbreaking confusion, or simple relational pain and loneliness … I thought it might be a good time to review God’s Word, meditate on Truth, grieve as needed, and most of all … be refreshed in Christ, our Savior. Our God. Our Brother and our Friend. And so. Here is a little FREE RETREAT from our family…
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When Peacemaking Causes Conflict
Have you ever tried to “fix” a relationship and “make peace” only to have it backfire in your face in such a terrible way that you really wish you had just left things alone? I have. There is just something so much easier (on the surface at least) and “nicer” about peace-faking. Sure, when we focus on protecting ourselves by denying that conflict exists or pretending that everything is fine—pasting a smile on our face while slamming shut the door of our heart—we know on a deep level that we are not loving because “love makes us vulnerable” (CS Lewis). But the pain of rejection and betrayal from people we…
