Tim Challies posted this Robert Frost poem a few days ago: “When a friend calls to me from the road And slows his horse to a meaning walk, I don’t stand still and look around On all the hills I haven’t hoed, And shout from where I am, What is it? No, not as there is a time to talk. I thrust my hoe in the mellow ground, Blade-end up and five feet tall, And plod: I go up to the stone wall  For a friendly visit.” Mmmmmmmmm … Don’t you just love the way poets capture real life at such a deep, resonant level? I have to say, adding…

Thanks to the great people over at Peacemaker Ministries for posting a link to this CCEF article by Tim Lane: Family Feuds: How to Respond The whole article is worth your read, but here is my favorite paragraph: “Often when we have a bad experience (like growing up in an abusive family), we let that experience define us and become our identity. But when you come to Jesus in faith he gives you his life and a whole new identity as a child of God. Of course you are still shaped by your experience, but you are not defined by it. Your identity is no longer determined by your family…

My post from yesterday about The Peacemaking Pastor being offered on Amazon for only $6.40 (!!) reminded me of an article I read by Andree Seu in last month’s World Magazine: Message from Morocco: Relationship-Building is the Task Overarching the To-Do List In it, she talks about receiving a call from a woman who is concerned about another woman who has three kids under six and is pregnant and is “exhibiting behavior reminiscent of the woman who drove her children into a lake some years ago.” The caller asked Andree for the pastor’s phone number because, well, “Evidently the pastor must be called into this because, well, everybody else is…

If you’ve ever listened to my testimony, you know that I come from a bit of a challenging family background. Thankfully, I have a good relationship with my mom, dad, and sister now. But every once in awhile, waves of emotions related to my past will splash over me (and often feel like they’re drowning me). This is especially true around the holidays. I don’t know why the holidays can be so tempting to feelings of sadness, loneliness, and dissatisfaction with family relationships. Maybe it’s the canned, fake sentimentality of a “Folgers Christmas Commercial” perfect family. Maybe it’s genuine grief over the effects of sin on this fractured life in…

Well … just like most topics in life, I surely didn’t know one QUARTER of the potential issues, interests, challenges, and pitfalls associated with this one. Yes, yes, like most Christians I had (casually) “mediated” (discussed?) topics and conflicts related church building usage over the years. And thinking back on it, I’d have to say that pretty much every conflicted church intervention I learned about or reviewed when I was still on staff at Peacemakers had at least one church building use issue—even if it was only a presenting issue. Still, I was surprised by how diverse the documentation from various churches is. Some really go the “three paragraph, only…

My friend and I are continuing to work through Ed Welch’s addictions curriculum, “Crossroads”. It is definitely worth the read, especially if you appreciated his book, “Addictions: A Banquet at the Grave”, if you struggle with an addiction, and/or if you know and love someone who struggles with an addiction. Today’s lesson included two quotes (one in the facilitator’s guide and the other in the basic material) that I wanted to share with you: “Are you frustrated with someone? Don’t bury it. Someday it will come out as a craving for your addiction.” “Bad relationships left to stew and ferment end in cravings.” Isn’t that SO true? Even if you…

Without getting into the complexities of major offenses (involving criminal activities, civil authorities, etc.) … Thinking only of the relatively mundane (but truly hurtful!) real-life conflicts that we all face in our workplaces, marriages, parenting, friendships, churches, schools, etc …Have you ever thought (or even SAID) something like this? “Sure. I forgive you. You bet. No problem. [But NOW I know the REAL YOU and I know to never EVER be real with you or trust you again.]” It’s almost as though we know we “HAVE TO” forgive, so we offer some token “Christian” words. But all the while, we are closing down our hearts. Tight. Locked. “You can’t hurt…

Today I had a very uncomfortable few hours wherein I wrestled with this reality: I was being required to do something that I simply could not do. It wasn’t immoral or illegal. (Thank God! I’d had THAT situation erupt as a first year associate attorney back in Chicago and I have to say, it’s shocking and horrible when you have to face that, “How will I respond?!?” question re: ethics / convictions / and your ability to pay back $73,000 in grad school loans. I chose to walk away, of course. But it was a frightening / the room is SPINNING / who am I REALLY kind of moment.) Today…

Many thanks to Terry P. for sending an encouraging email, poem, and this John Calvin quote too: “Every Christian should have his Church enclosed  within his heart, and be affected with its maladies, as if they were his own, sympathize with its sorrows, and bewail its sins.” John Calvin  

What a great roundup of articles on church discipline (including a legal risk management one  by Ken Sande)! Hooray for IX Marks: Facing Up to Church Discipline