The Person May be Doing their Part Behind the Scenes

I very much appreciated this recent article by Pastor Kevin DeYoung:

In it, he talks about the pressure that people in public positions sometimes have to comment on, well, everything—doctrine, politics, biblical manhood/womanhood, education choices, organic food, recycling, cats versus dogs, tea versus coffee, whether The West Wing was a terrible show or a great show. (OK. OK. I’m making 99% of those examples up—Pastor DeYoung’s were only the serious ones. But hopefully you get the point.)

This is actually a topic that I have tried to come to a prayerful, principled position on—especially as regards my opinions on certain Christian authors and speakers. Boy! Have some people tried to force me to take a public stance on certain ministries and ministry leaders. It’s awkward because (of course) I want people to be prayerful and principled as they read and listen and learn. It’s just that:

a) I’m not the Holy Spirit;

b) I’m not their close friend or trusted spiritual advisor;

c) Some things are debatable issues (godly, mature, biblically-faithful, wise and loving Christians disagree on things);

d) Really really smart people have already voices LOTS of opinions and positions about these teachers (so I’m not sure I can really add anything productive or edifying to the discussion) and

e) I always want to be careful to remember that the people being discussed “out there” in the “public realm” (especially in the oft’ cruel forum of the wild wild internet web) are people. They are humans with hopes, dreams, fears, struggles, temptations, doubts, sin, unbelief, maturities and immaturities. And I wonder if one day I might have the privilege of helping them as a Christian mediator.

You see … that last one is a real issue to me and that is something that you will never hear about on this blog because I take my professional standards as a Certified Christian Conciliator (with the Institute for Christian Conciliation, a division of Peacemaker Ministries) very seriously. When I help someone? I don’t talk about it with others unless it is necessary (or compelled). (See ICC Rule 17.) This (limited, because it is biblical) confidentiality protects me and it protects the people I serve. And the only reason I have the privilege of interacting with “famous” people (and “normal like me” people) is because I have (hopefully!) honored God and neighbor by keeping appropriate confidences.

Pastor DeYoung’s last point (as to why Person B may not make the public statement you want him to make) mentions this reasoning too:

3. The person or persons you want to speak up may be doing their part behind the scenes. Or they may know more about a situation than is presented in public reports. Or maybe they figure there isn’t anything new, edifying, or clarifying that can be said. I’m a blogger, a preacher, a writer, and someone with lots of opinions, convictions, and ideas. I don’t find it hard to jump in with a thought on most issues. But I’ve learned over the years my first instinct to say something is not always best. And I’ve learned that making assumptions about those who stay on the sidelines is not good either. There are too many things I don’t know to speak on everything, and too many things I don’t know to assume the worst about those who don’t chime in on everything that’s important to me. Let’s be careful not to shame people for not saying what we want them to say precisely when we want them to say it.

Amen! And thanks, Pastor DeYoung.